Lawyer and Woman Jokes

Joke 1:
Two men eating grass

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One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw
two men eating grass by the roadside. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to
investigate.

"Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man.

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied.

"Oh, come along with me then."

"But sir, I have a wife with two children!"

"Bring them along! And you, come with us too!" he said to the other man.

"But sir, I have a wife with six children!" the second man answered.

"Bring them as well!"

They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows says, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."

The lawyer replied, "No problem, the grass at my home is about two feet tall."

Joke 2:
Woman Will Always Be Smarter



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A woman and a man are involved in a car accident.
It's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt.
After they crawl out of their cars,
The woman says,
"So you're a man, that's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days."
The man replied,
"I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God! "
The woman continued,
"And look at this, here's another miracle.... My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune."
Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man shakes his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.
The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.
The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"
The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police"


Moral of the jokes:

Women brain is as good as the lawyer

 

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