MEANING OF KISSES


THE CONSTITUTION OF LOVE CODE
If you love someone, show them and say so!


STATEMENT

If a kiss is the language of love, then we have a lot to talk about!

METHODS OF LOVE

Kiss on the ear--------------I'm Horny
Kiss on the cheek----------We're Friends
Kiss on the hand-----------I Adore You
Kiss on the shoulder-----I Want You
Kiss on the lips-------------I Love You



Definitions of Kisses


Prof of Economics : Kiss is that thing for which the demand is always higher than the supply.

Prof. of Accountancy : Kiss is a credit because it is profitable when returned.

Prof. of Algebra : Kiss is infinity because two divided by nothing.

Prof. of Geometry : Kiss is the shortest distance between two lips.

Prof. of Physics : Kiss is the contraction of mouth due to the expansion of the heart.

Prof. of Chemistry : Kiss is the reaction of the interaction between two hearts.

Prof. of Zoology : Kiss is the interchange of salivary bacteria.

Prof. of Physiology : Kiss is the juxtaposition of two orbicularisoris muscles in the state of contraction.

Prof. of Dentistry : Kiss is infectious and antiseptic.

Prof. of Statistics : Kiss is an event whose probability depends on the vital statistics of 36-24-36.

Prof. of Philosophy : Kiss is the persecution for the child, ecstasy for the youth and homage for the old.

Prof. of English : Kiss is a noun that is used as a conjunction; it is more common than proper; it is spoken in the plural and it is applicable to all.

Prof. of Architecture : Kiss is a process which builds a solid bond between the two dynamic objects

Prof. of Comp.Science : What is a kiss? It seems to be an undefined variable


 

4 Comments:

Post a Comment

Boss Reaction During Recession

In the begining.....Boss: Be good, you will be fine.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us



After a week...
Must Work Hard ?
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us



After a month...
Must Work Hard for " Lim Peh " yu know!
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us




After a Quarter....
Can you hear me? you must work hard!!!
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

 

5 Comments:

Post a Comment

It's good to keep abreast of Engineering Knowledge

IT'S GOOD TO KEEP ABREAST OF ENGINEERING
KNOWLEDGE... ...


'Educated' guys with a gifted ability for spacial visualisation, will be better 'equipped' to 'grasp' this intellectually 'uplifting' but abstract concept!! If you don't well do not be distressed! Just take a deep 'breasth' slowly exhale, count to 10 and it'll come to you!!
Sinusoidal or Harmonic Motion?
This is a quick lesson in physics for all engineers and should be passed on to others like them who wonder about these sort of things.


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
For non - Engineers... ..
This is Sinusoidal Motion


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

But Trained Engineers Know
This As
Harmonic Motion


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
However To My Trained Engineering Eye
This is Classic
Sinusoidal & Harmonic Motion?




YES
I Like to Keep
'A Breast'
Of
Engineering Problems

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Bra for Men?

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Who said bras are only for women?

A Japanese online lingerie retailer is selling bras for cross-dressing men and they've quickly become one of its most popular items.
Since launching two weeks ago on Rakuten, a major Japanese web shopping mall, the Wishroom shop has sold over 300 men's bras for 2,800 yen ($30) each. The shop also stocks men's panties, as well as lingerie for women.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

"I like this tight feeling. It feels good," Wishroom representative Masayuki Tsuchiya told Reuters as he modeled the bra, which can be worn discreetly under men's clothing.
Wishroom Executive Director Akiko Okunomiya said she was surprised at the number of men who were looking for their inner woman.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

"I think more and more men are becoming interested in bras. Since we launched the men's bra, we've been getting feedback from customers saying 'wow, we'd been waiting for this for such a long time'," she said.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

But the bra, available in black, pink and white, is not an easy sell for all men.
The underwear has stirred a heated debate online with more than 8,000 people debating the merits of men wearing bras in one night on Mixi, Japan's top social network website.

($1=94.34 Yen)

 

2 Comments:

Post a Comment

Bruce Lee playing ping pong with nunchucks

An ad for a Nokia N96 phone featuring a digitally inserted Bruce Lee playing ping pong with nunchucks.

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

If Engineer were to write recipe

Chocolate Chip Cookies: Ingredients:

532.35 cm3 gluten
4.9 cm3 NaHCO3
4.9 cm3 refined halite
236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride
177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11
177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11
4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde
Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein
473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao
236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)

Directions:

To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant agitation. Care must be taken at this point in the reaction to control any temperature rise that may be the result of an exothermic reaction.

Using a screw extrude attached to a #4 nodulizer, place the mixture piece-meal on a 316SS sheet (300 x 600 mm). Heat in a 460K oven for a period of time that is in agreement with Frank & Johnston’s first order rate expression (see JACOS, 21, 55), or until golden brown. Once the reaction is complete, place the sheet on a 25C heat-transfer table, allowing the product to come to equilibrium.



 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Fake New York Times

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

The Iraq and Afghanistan wars are over, if you can believe a fake copy of the New York Times circulating around Manhattan today.
The paper was allegedly printed by the parodists "The Yes Men," who are responsible for myriad politically-oriented pranks that were the subject of a major film.
Articles in the paper announce dozens of new initiatives including the
establishment of national health care, the abolition of corporate
lobbying, a maximum wage for C.E.O.s, and, of course, the end of the
war.

The paper, an exact replica of The New York Times, includes
International, National, New York, and Business sections, as well as
editorials, corrections, and a number of advertisements, including a
recall notice for all cars that run on gasoline. There is also a
timeline describing the gains brought about by eight months of
progressive support and pressure, culminating in President Obama's "Yes
we REALLY can" speech. (The paper is post-dated July 4, 2009.)

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

"Obama" visit Indonesia

UPDATE: 19 JAN 2009

Obama look-alike shoots to fame in Indonesia

Indonesian photographer Ilham Anas won't be at U.S. President Barack Obama's inauguration on Tuesday. Instead he'll be starring as an Obama look-alike on Indonesian TV.
Ilham Anas, 34, who from some angles bears a resemblance to the new U.S. president, shot to fame in Jakarta after Obama, 47, won the election in November, and is now earning income as an Obama double.
Many Indonesians have a keen interest in Obama, who lived in Jakarta for four years after his American mother, Ann Dunham, married Muslim Indonesian Lolo Soetoro following the end of her marriage to Obama's Kenyan father.

"When Obama won, my colleagues played a practical joke on me -- they made me wear a suit, a tie, and took pictures of me posing as Obama," Anas told Reuters on Saturday.
"The pictures spread very quickly on the Internet. It was phenomenal. Then TV stations and an advertising agency got in touch with me."

That led to an appearance in a pharmaceuticals advertisement in the Philippines where he played Obama, who is due to be sworn in as the 44th U.S. president on Tuesday.
Anas, who was born and raised in Bandung, West Java, said he feels lucky to resemble Obama.
"I never thought I would be a star in a commercial, then this happened. It's very fortunate," Anas said.
"I was in the airport in Malaysia in transit and a man approached me and asked: 'Are you Obama?'. I was very surprised when he asked to take a picture together and bought me a meal," said Anas, flashing a broad smile.
If he ever gets the chance to meet Obama, Anas said he would ask the U.S. president to take a firm stance in dealing with the conflict between Israel and Palestine.





Ilham Anas record a commercial in the Philippines, advertising a medical product taking place during a dinner with an actress playing their President Gloria Arroyo.





"Obama" visit Indonesia to see his long lost friends

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Long time no see
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
You are my true friend

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Congratulation Mr. "Obama"

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
So nice to see all of you in Malaysia

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Welcome to Indonesia

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
One for the album

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Obama Fashion 2008

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
The dress is fashionable to show in France


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
For someone Obama - the whole world

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Your Age by Restaurant Maths

YOUR AGE BY DINER & RESTAURANT MATHS


Simple Calculator to help you


DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST!

It takes less than a minute. Work this out as you read .

Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!

This is not one of those waste of time things, it's fun.


1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to go out to eat. (more than once but less than 10)

2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)

3. Add 5

4. Multiply it by 50

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1758...

If you haven't, add 1757.

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.

You should have a three digit number.

The first digit of this was your original number. (I.e., How many times you want to go out to restaurants in a week.)

The next two numbers are













YOUR AGE ! ------ (Oh YES, it is!)

THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2008) IT WILL EVER WORK

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Blondes favorite car

Q. Why is a blondes favorite car a BMW?

A. Because she can spell it!

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

 

3 Comments:

Post a Comment

Unspoken communication

Unspoken communication. Body language – what does yours say about you? Can you read others body language? Most of our communication is non verbal. We can attract people to us by our body language or we can repel people away because of it.

Difference between Guys and Girls Unspoken Communication


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

The Best Of The Worst

A REAL KOREAN IDOL

Korean boy's SINGING "TOUCH MY BODY", Mariah Carey's song
Warning: You will laugh non stop




A REAL AMERICAN IDOL
WILLIAM HUNG SING "SHE BANGS"




William Hung a.k.a. Hong Kong Ricky Martin performs "She Bangs" on American Idol show. He can't sing, he can't dance, but nevertheless he became famous!

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

What gender is 'computer'?

A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.

'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la casa.'
'Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.'

A student asked, 'What gender is 'computer'?'

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves
whether computer' should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us


The men's group decided that 'computer' should definitely be of the feminine gender ('la computadora'), because:


1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;


2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;


3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and


4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.


(THIS GETS BETTER!)


The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine ('el computador'), because:


1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;


2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;


3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and


4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.


The women won.

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

How to Take Good Photos

Taking good photos of such environments requires some skill.
I’m sure you’ll start getting better results. Happy shooting!



Image Hosted by ImageShack.us


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

 

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

McCain, Obama, Palin condoms selling well

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

A street vender sells McCain, Obama and Palin condoms in New York's Times Square, October 31, 2008.
Obama condom carries the slogan "Use With Good Judgment." The McCain version says "Old but not expired." Palin condom carries the slogan "When Abortion Is Not An Option"

More jokes below:

Elephant's Choice

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Valerie, a 26-year-old female African elephant picks Democratic presidential candidate Sen. Barack Obama, picture over Republican presidential candidate Sen. John McCain, at Six Flags Discovery Kingdom in Vallejo, Calif., Wednesday, Oct. 29. The elephant is the symbol of the Republican party.

Donkey's Choice

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Sister, a 33-year-old female Mediterranean donkey selects the picture of Republican presidential candidate Sen. John McCain, rather than Democratic presidential candidate Sen. Barack Obama, at Six Flags Discovery Kingdom in Vallejo, Calif., Wednesday, Oct. 29. The donkey is the symbol of the Democratic party.

Chinese Zodiac Signs of US Presidents
Who will Win?
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

 

2 Comments:

Post a Comment

Smart Kids Jokes

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

A six-year-old boy told his father he wanted to marry the little girl across the street. The father, being modern and well-schooled in handling children, hid his smile behind his hand.
'That's a serious step,' he said. 'Have you thought it out completely?'
'Yes,' his young son answered. 'We can spend one week in my room and the next in hers. It's right across the street, so I can run home if I get scared of the dark.'
'How about transportation?' the father asked.
'I have my wagon, and we both have our tricycles,' the little boy answered.
The boy had an answer to every question the father raised.
Finally, in exasperation, his dad asked, 'What about babies? When you're married, you're liable to have babies, you know.'
'We've thought about that, too,' the little boy replied. 'We're not going to have babies. Every time she lays an egg, I'm going to step on it!'


Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends. Every day they would sit together to eat their lunch. They discovered that they both brought chicken sandwiches every day!
This went on all through the fourth and fifth grades, until one day he noticed that her sandwich wasn't a chicken sandwich. He said, "Hey, how come you're not eating chicken, don't you like it anymore?" She said "I love it but I have to stop eating it." "Why?" he asked. She pointed to her lap and said "Cause I'm starting to grow little feathers down there!"
"Let me see" he said. "Okay" and she pulled up her skirt.

He looked and said, "That's right. You are! Better not eat any more chicken." He kept eating his chicken sandwiches until one day he brought peanut butter. He said to the little girl, "I have to stop eating chicken sandwiches; I'm starting to get feathers Down there too!" She asked if she could look, so he pulled down his pants for her! She said... "Oh, my God, it's too late for you! You've already got the NECK and GIBLETS!!!"



A stern father was taking his little son Johnny for a walk in the park when a honeybee landed on a rock in front of them. The boy stepped forward and crushed the bee with his shoe. The father said, "That was cruel, and for being cruel, you'll get no honey for a whole year."
Later, Johnny deliberately stepped on a butterfly. "Just for that," the father said, "you'll have no butter for a year."
When they returned home, Johnny's mother was fixing dinner. As she walked into the kitchen, she spied a cockroach and immediately crushed it. Johnny looked at his father impishly and asked, "Shall I tell her, Dad, or will you?"

 

2 Comments:

Post a Comment